Monday, September 28, 2009

So its getting harder and harder to wait...

Its amazing how you can have good days and bad days and sometimes a great day can still end up finding you thinking about why its taking so long, and then get down. Had a great day at home with the girls today. Although as I am getting ready for bed I realize that once again I am finding myself missing Mateo. I think about all of the nights I am missing tucking him in, reading to him. We went to the Cider Mill today. We always go there to get pumpkins in the fall, and of course have to sample the donuts & cider...I realize that that was a moment that Mateo would have enjoyed. The girls had already been there many of times before they were 2 1/2. God grant me patience, strength, and please keep your hands on anyone that is in charge of our file at CNA. Please encourage them, and let them work with their hearts and hurry to move our cases along. Another Halloween, another Thanksgiving, and another Christmas that will be without my son, & the girls brother. I found his little monkey that I always bring with me on my trips to Guatemala, and then his little blankey that he sleeps with when I am with him. I was drawn to just hold them, as those were things that he slept with the last time I was with him.

I just want to cry sometimes and scream because I am so mad that this has taken so long. How one false document that we knew nothing about, that really didnt have anything to do with Mateo and us bringing him home could cost us over a year and 1/2 with our son, so far. So I go to bed again tonight praying for Mateo to come home soon!! Please keep us in your prayers!